Here at Circuit Shitty, where service is state of the fart. Do they even use that line still? Image by Larry Tomlinson via Flickr

Circuit Shitty City remains one of the most annoying places to shop, in my opinion. You will never find a more wretched hide of incompetence and arrogance. Don’t ever think about using their online service to pick something up for someone else, and use their credit card. They’ll shit on you faster than godzilla on Ex-Lax, even if you have a NOTARIZED LETTER SAYING THEY CAN PICK IT UP. Assholes.

I write about them today because recently, Circuit City made one of the best business decisions it ever made: It decided to commit suicide. It filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy and recently announced its liquidation, which basically means that the store will jack up the price of the merch, then reduce it to the same price to make it look like a discount. By the time prices actually DO go down, there’ll be nothing left but shit to buy.

I also find it amusing that if you go to Circuit City’s website, you’ll find an awesome suicide note notice that they’re going out of business. One part in particular:

The [decision] process was extremely difficult and we were left with no other choice but to liquidate.  Circuit City had a proud heritage of serving the public for 60 years and we deeply regret the impact this decision will have on our associates, our customers and the communities where we have operated stores and other facilities.

No. Unfortunately, we will not be able to provide delivery services for products purchased from liquidation stores.

No, we will not be offering home installation services.

Yes, we will pretend to kiss your ass, then fuck you over one more time (Sorry, this one is mine, not Circuit Shitty’s.)

So ends a horribly stupid company and its downright incompetence. While I’m not that big a fan of Best Buy either, Circuit City was the the septic tank in the brick and mortal retail cesspool. Good riddance to shitty storez.

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According to The Secret, the universe is a giant bald muscle man who grants wishes to everyone, LSD not included. Image via Wikipedia

Oh my god, how I hate this sorry excuse of a universal “Law.” I don’t think there’s many more things out there I hate more than the “Law” of Attraction, and that’s REALLY saying something! I cringe every time I hear that nimrod Steve Pavlina or those idiots from The Secret blabvertise the LoA as if it were bigger than Jesus. Yes, I said it. The Law of Attraction is becoming Bigger than Jesus, and I don’t like it one bit.

The core premise of the “Law” of Attraction is that what you put into this universe is what you get. The way that The Secret puts it is that you visualize what you want, and then you get it after thinking real hard about it. Now, a lot of the propagators who aren’t involved with The Secret think that it’s misinterpreting the “Law” of Attraction, proving once again that with every new stupid religion (As the LoA is destined to become at this rate,) there’s bound to be a great “Schism.” Don’t believe me? How do you think Christianity got started? It was an offshoot of the Judaic religion, just as Protestantism got it’s start after giving Catholicism the holy middle finger.

But anyway, these proponents of the “True Law” of Attraction make it clear that one must work while visualizing to attain these goals, else it will be for nothing…where does this sound familiar? How about “Hard Work” and “Dedication.” Yes, these morals that even I approve of have suddenly become “Mystic” and Part of something greater.

I could go on and on and on about the “Law” of Attraction, and thus take away from the rest of the blog, but that would be stupid, and I would hate that. Hence,  I will be crapping out a new blog dedicated to the “Law” of Attraction, but that’s for another day. I apparently have attracted myself a need to use the bathroom, possibly because of the Taco Bell I ate.

I send my resume. They tell me to take this online assessment thingy.

After I take the assessment, which was a piece of shit, some person emails me and tells me I failed.
Then, today, I get this wonder in my box:

We have carefully reviewed your background and it is with much regret that we notify you that we were able to determine that we have other candidates whose qualifications are better suited for our needs for the position.

Really? Carefully? Looks to me like it was a boolean operation: Pass or Fail. When they “carefully reviewed my background,” all they probably fucking did was click a button!

So basically, any sales person who sat on their ass but kept their fucking instruction manual could pass their worthless assessment, and people who didn’t want to lie about their experience, (like me) but clearly could answer the fucking questions get passed on.

I love capitalism sometimes. (That was sarcastic, but I’m too tired to write a WiHATE on Capitalism. Probably been done anyway.)

So yeah, if you’re smarter then a salesperson, (and if you have an IQ higher then a shark’s, you are,) don’t apply to anything T-Mobile offers. Pointless.

One time, I got to the bank at Exactly 4:00 P.M, but of course, they’ve locked the door, and the scroungy fuck in a bad suit is smiling and giving me the “sorry, but I ain’t lettin’ in noone, nobody” look.

It was everything I had to not give the shithead the finger.

But, this is what I’ve known Shittybank to do. Ever since they bought California Federal, they’ve another, more student-friendly bank.

Citibank doesn’t give a shit. It’s almost as bad as Bank of America, or rather, Bank of Associating Fees. It cares not about its customers, just about making money.

Yes, Yes, so do the other banks, but not to the extent Shiti does. It’s like Teh Shitty doesn’t even want your damn business. No, wait, they just want your fucking cash.

Citibank: Live Richly*

* Provided you are an executive of CitiGroup.

Almost forgot: We also have to state limitations on our studies, or “Why our studies is cool, but still sucks” section.

Then you get the priveledge of basically taking whatever the hell you had in your prospectus, and turn it into your big-ass paper without the prof. noticing anything.

Naturally, this being my first prospectus, it recieved a…shall we say, less then average grade. So we get to rewrite the damn thing.

I know it’s important, but it’s just fucking time-comsuming.

Then, they grab a bag or whatever, shut their car, and take off. You’ve just wasted upwards of two to five minutes waiting for this butthole, only to discover that he/she’s simply putting shit away!

PEOPLE WHO DO THIS INFURIATE ME!

I was waiting once at my University’s parking lot, where I eye this nimrod putting shit in his trunk. Apparantely, his trunk lock was broken, and he had to tie his fucking trunk shut!

So I wait. Then he CLEARLY SEES that I have my blinker on, and continues to tie his fucking trunk. I figure “He’s getting ready to go.”

Nope. He grabs his bag and takes off, pretending I don’t even exist.

It’s one thing if you don’t notice, but if you clearly look and see someone waiting for your spot, you have an obligation to tell them if you are not leaving. It’s ok to say you’re not leaving if you’re not. That way, we don’t waste precious time on you, and we can go look for other potential spots.

But I will tell you this: Though I don’t have the heart to do it, if you are one of these people, you deserve to get your car keyed. If you don’t have the fucking common coutesy to tell the person that you’re not leaving, you deserve it. You’re probably one of those fucks who offers cuts in line, huh? Or maybe one of those people who after seeing someone back out of a space you passed, will go back and park in it, even though there was someone RIGHT BEHIND YOU at the spot.

Whatever the case, if you are one of the people who do this…

STOP NOW!!!!!!

And that is all.

Apple champions itself as the fighter against conformity, as you can see here. However, THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT THEY’RE DOING TODAY?

Don’t believe me? Look at your iPod. The only thing it works with is Apple’s software: iTunes. Now, iTunes isn’t a bad piece of software, but it doesn’t fucking play nice. Apple, the company that wants consumers to have a “better” alternative, essentially behaves the same way as Microsoft does!

This isn’t to say that MS is the best thing in the universe, but Apple needs to fucking practice what it preaches.

The iPod isn’t even that good of an MP3 Player! No FM Tuner, can’t work with other programs…The only good thing going for it is their wheel-thingy. Me? The proud owner of an iRiver H20! Everything I need, no conformity, FM Tuner, everything! But no, even MY FRIENDS CALL IT AN IPOD! That’s how bad it’s gotten! Every god damn MP3 player is called an ipod to some people! IT’S A FUCKING iRIVER!

Fucking ipoops. Don’t get one. Want a better one? Comment with your needs, and I’ll see what I can do.

And no, don’t say you want video. The video of an iPod is about as crappy as Tom Arnold after taking ExLax.

The best Peds, though, are the ones that think that they have the right to cross across a street without using a crosswalk (Jaywalking) and walk along there as slow as they desire.

I’ll admit I’ve walked across the street without a crosswalk, but everytime I have, I literally dashed across the freeway. Let me tell you, I’m a big guy, and if I can run across a four-lane road in a three-piece suit carrying a portfolio 3/4s the size of the average teenager, (and I have,)  I think any healthy fuck can speed his way across and not make us stop for your stupidity.

The way I take doing that is this: If I’m not using a crosswalk, then other drivers can legally hit me. This is something jaywalkers need to realize. I mean, I’m not gonna deliberately try to hit jaywalkers, but I shouldn’t be held responsible for their stupidity if something happened.

Also, I understand some people, such as the elderly, young, or handicapped, have difficulty walking. That’s OK. It’s when you’re CLEARLY in your fucking prime, and you seem to deliberately be going slow in the crosswalk. One of my former friends (This wasn’t the reason why we’re not friends anymore) admitted that this was exactly what she does when she goes across a crosswalk.

You don’t have to dash across a crosswalk on a green light.

This is a blog were I describe all the things I hate, and if you hate them too, post about why you hate it. If you like it, post anyway. I don’t care, and odds are, I won’t even look at it.

You’ll notice that the subdomain is whyihatex, with x being any damn thing I want to write about. I did that because I don’t think WP’s people would like a subdomain that looks like “whyihate.wordpress.com”

Because I like WP. It makes Livejournal look like the shit of shit. Believe me, LJ’s gonna earn its WIH (Why I hate) Blog soon enough.
With that, I shall write a reasonable evil entry.